Two weeks later... a few thoughts from the front line of motherhood

No one tells you how hard parenthood is going to be. I think it is a secret to ensure that we continue to have children. Sunday, Jonathan turned 2 weeks old. It has been the longest two weeks of my life. I am not sure I even remember our life before July 9th that clearly anymore. It could just be the sleep deprivation talking. I am surprised at what I have learned in the past couple weeks. You spend your whole like learning how to be good at something, through school, work, etc, but then you become a parent and realize you really know nothing when it comes to raising a child. It is a huge shock to know that you are completely clueless about something so important. A few other things I never knew about motherhood:

1. Tiredness completely takes over your life. You need to feed your baby every 2.5 to 3 hours - round-the-clock. I read this while I was pregnant, but I had no idea that it took an hour to feed him, leaving you about 1.5 to 2 hours to live your life, sleep and do all of the things you need to finish. So after spending 8+ hours a day feeding, there is little time for anything else.
2. Nothing is as stressful as when your baby cries for seemingly no reason. Jonathan has reflux, so his tummy feels bad almost all the time. So he cries, arches his back and turns red from the discomfort. I would do anything to take away his pain, but there is not that much I can do, and that is a bad feeling.
3. Everyone has an opinion about how your raise your child. My father was lobbying for us to give him a bath every night (even before the cord fell off) because that is why Jonathan was fussy. My mom tells me that I should feed him more and forget pumping if it is hard just use formula. One lactation consultant suggested that I get a sling and hold him close all day so he cries less. While someone else said that maybe I was not trying hard enough to feed him at the breast (I pump and bottle feed since the hospital stay). This is all so confusing. You would think by now we can map the human genome, so we would have also cracked the code for raising babies.
4. You are never sure if you are doing the right thing. There is a study about everything, many if conflicting opinions from the experts. If you let your child watch TV before age 2, he has a higher chance of being ADHD (study). But then again maybe not (study). Use a pacifier to prevent SIDS, but maybe you should not if you breastfeed (study). Attachment parents or scheduled feedings to have a happy, healthy baby? (study) Or maybe the authors of Freakonomics are right when they say, "Parenting technique is highly overrated. When it comes to early test scores, it's not so much what you do as a parent, it's who you are. and what parents do is less important than who they are. " (reprint) So what is a modern loving parent to do?
5. You never can figure out how you lived before your child came along. I resisted motherhood for years because I was not sure how it would affect us, but watching Jonathan sit in front of me sleeping as I type, I feel a level of love and adoration I could never have imagined. The pain and stress of the past couple weeks seem completely worth it. :)